resistance

Ok, it seemed a good idea before hand, but not so much now.

Feeling of resistance, partly based on a sense of silliness — what’s the point of doing this? — and also some sense/fear of exposure (which has always been big for me).  Not to mention an awareness that there really is enough narcissism in the culture today.  Just the existence of the personal blog is demonstrations of that!  why,really would anyone want to keep a personal journal  that anyone else could read?

Resistance also as a reflection of life-view, of fear as a standard-operating-procedure.  Which I do not like. The feeling that I often live my life half-numb (better than clinical depression, no doubt, a thousand times better, but still not really ALIVE.)   so, the reasons for doing this do stand!

A realizations yesterday, that one first step towrd something I have resistance toward can really reduce the discomfort.

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